listening to music

“So... It's a big mess, but if we can find comfort in this big mess, we can successfully enter good relationships with each other. In the music for me it is very easy. The relationships are the relationships between different tones, that rise from deeper level of consciousness. And they end up on the levels where you can already hear them.

So it's not about creating too much, it's about bringing something out that's already inside. How does this thing that's inside you want to express itself? This is like a... you can take an interesting path. For me, when I listen to my own music, I actually find that the fresher or the more latest it is, it's actually getting better.

It's not like... Let's say I composed something in the past. And this was like really good. But then the things that are fresher are kinda more close to me, somehow. Because they are more personal, the memories are shinier, brighter.

So this recording, maybe you can hear it in the background, it's from this spring. I am not sure, what it really is. For me, when I play these things, there's always this thing that attempts to break through. But for some reason, it's limited.

When I was starting this video, I was thinking I would make it as long as the song lasts. And the song lasts like 8 minutes. And now I'm already out of thoughts, out of words. But I think it's good if there's a video in somewhere just for ease... I am not attempting to tell anybody or anything about how things are. And just simply be.

The way you naturally tend to behave, is actually the way you as a character are. Alan Watts said that the poet is always trying to describe what cannot be described. But we're making pretty good attempts and...

I got this free computer. Let's see, how long is the video going. Ok, we have 2 more minutes. We can go into deep meditation.

For me, it has been a challenge to remain peaceful. Lot of anxious and aggressive energies are coming towards me. And there's like so much buzzing going on, how to remain calm. And good relationships with your central nerval system. How do you create a good relationship between you and your nerves?

You do asanas. You breathe. You approach the chi flow in such a way, that the natural harmonious... In Jodhpur I very often did this meditation: I sit at the bottom of the lake. Imagine that I am sitting at the bottom of a lake, meditating, when it was like plus plus plus plus 47 degrees or whatever. Then I imagine just sitting at the bottom of the lake.

Orgonite is very good. I read it helps the time flow.”